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Ralph
‘My opinion isn’t the only thing that raises eyebrows’

JON Ralph has been told to keep his eyebrows under control after they triggered a viewer’s epileptic fit last Friday night.

Shane Smith was enjoying Fox Footy’s post-match discussion at home when Ralph’s wriggling brows sent him into a short hypnotic trance and severe seizure, forcing him to froth at the mouth and collapse to the floor.

Paramedics treated Mr Smith at the scene before taking him to hospital, where he remains in a critical condition in intensive care.

The incident is understood to have shaken Ralph, with the Foxtel and Herald-Sun reporter reportedly undertaking emergency eyebrow therapy classes at the John Howard Institute of Hairy Caterpillars, where he has attended weekly sessions for two years.

A  source said network producers had repeatedly ignored warnings about the dangers of Ralph’s facial hair.

 

 

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